Facing My Fears In The Journey

Sometimes I’m afraid of life.

I’m strong. I have faith. I am beyond thankful for my blessings. But I sometimes think about the road ahead and wonder what speedbumps are lying there, waiting for me while I’m distracted by the pretty landscape.

There are things in this life I don’t think I could handle, and I pray that I never experience them to find out. Despite the reality that I am uniquely created to handle all that this life holds for me, I’ll admit – I sometimes doubt myself.

The world in which we live carries enough worry of its own. This is an era in which erroneous and grossly exaggerated information spreads like wildfire (while simultaneously taking the focus off of far more pressing issues), an era in which individuals create their own definitions and become belligerent when someone disagrees, and a world in which everyone seems to hate each other for reasons they can’t adequately articulate.

Life is short, truth is relative, and nothing matters unless it matters to you.

Maybe it has always been like this, but honestly, it’s all wildly depressing to me. It’s so easy to get caught up in the trivial – today’s big thing that’s gone tomorrow.

But all it takes is a bolt of lightning to shift our focus in ways we never could have imagined, when we start to see the world for what it is – a broken place where we’re supposed to work together to heal each other.

And we fail at that. Miserably.

I don’t want to live my whole life with my eyes glued to the road, determined to dodge every bump. Sometimes the flat tire comes at just the right corner for us to enjoy the view or spot another fellow weary traveler to encourage. And we never know if those flat tires prevent us from joining the three-car-pileup further on down the road.

All I can do is spiritually prepare myself for what’s to come in the hopes that I can face life’s challenges in a way that makes my children proud. I want to show them that this world, while broken, holds great meaning and Truth, and that they can have a life of incredible influence, no matter what obstacles come their way.

I hope I can do that, and I can only hope that I’ll have the courage to hold fast to that when I’m broken.