My Warrior Dash Experience

The craziest frickin' day of your life!

I wouldn’t exactly call it that. Honestly, I’ve had crazier days at home with the kids. But it was definitely an experience, and I’d even call it a fun one!

My good friend Maris talked me into participating since she’d done it last year and thought it was a blast. (Of course she did – she bikes, like, a thousand miles every weekend.) Also, I figured it would give me incentive to get back into shape after having Abram. (Which it did, sometimes, when he actually took decent naps and I didn’t feel like I’d been hit by a train.)

Now, we all know I’m no Jillian Michaels, but for goodness sakes, why is it that every time I mentioned to someone that I was going to do Warrior Dash, the response was something like, “You’re doing that?”

Yes, I know I just had a baby five months ago, and yes, I know the website makes it sound like only badass, hardcore people who enjoy gnawing on giant turkey legs – medieval style – would ever do such a thing.

But, you guys, come on. It’s just a 5K with some wall climbing and fire jumping. (Oh, and lots of mud.)

Plus, I’ve birthed two children. I’m more badass than you think. ;)

I saw warriors of all types and abilities there, so if you’re thinking about doing it but aren’t sure, I say go for it! You don’t have to worry about finishing quickly (there are even lines at some of the obstacles), and you just might make some friends along the way.

Novice Participant Advice:

 

 

Start at the front of the line. I thought I’d be considerate and start toward the back of the line so I wouldn’t get trampled by the crazy warriors be in anyone’s way. Unfortunately, that meant I was at the back of the line at the Giant Cliffhanger (rope climb), which put me quite behind.

Not that it really matters if you’re unconcerned with your time…

Wear something wacky. There are costumes of all types, so get creative if you want. Or don’t, if you’d rather not call any additional attention to yourself as you’re getting pummeled by tires in the rubber jungle or precariously teetering across the tightrope. That’s okay, too.

Consider your wardrobe when applying sunscreen. I knew I was going to destroy whatever I wore, so I donned a ridiculously loud tie-dye swimsuit coverup that had been in the bottom of my drawer for years. I’m not used to wearing racerbacks, so I kind of missed some spots and ended up with a weird burn. Oops.

Go with a group. I can see how it could be so much more fun if you're with a bunch of other goofballs. We just took two of our favorite goofballs (our kids), and although they weren't allowed on the course, they still had a blast. Hannah ran back and forth between tents while yelling, "I'm running a race! I'm a fast girl!" Future warrior, indeed.

Maybe one day we'll run it together as a family, complete with costumes!

Conserve your energy just before you get to an obstacle. The photographers are on the other side of some of them. Right after you complete the obstacle, put on your best diehard warrior façade and grimace for the camera!

I totally plan on participating again next year, but I’ve still got a long way to go before I beat this year’s winning time. In fact, I’m going to go ahead and put it on record here that it’s never going to happen. The guy with the best time ran six-minute miles. SIX. MINUTE. MILES. That’s impressive when there are no obstacles, but to do it when you’re also climbing cargo nets and swimming through mud?

I’d like to shake your hand, sir.