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Am I doing this right?
This is a question I have been asking myself since my daughter was only 15 minutes old and I nursed her for the first time.
In fact, as a first-time mom, I was kind of obsessed with this question for the first year of her life. Is she eating enough? Why doesn’t she nap like she is supposed to? Is that eczema or a yeast rash? How the heck do you tell the difference?! Is this much drool normal?
It wasn’t until her first birthday that I began to ease up and feel like I was finally getting the hang of this “mom” thing. She was healthy and happy, and we were having so much fun together. I was feeling more confident and happily dealt out advice to my friends who had newborns. But before too long, a whole new wave of parenting concerns hit me. Tantrums? Sharing? Playground etiquette? Whoa. I felt confident that I could meet my daughter’s basic needs for sleep and nourishment but this was a whole new ball game. My work as a parent was just beginning—and I was only dealing with a 17 month old, what was it going to be like with a 17 year old?
Of course this wasn’t a completely new realization. I knew from the time I held that positive pregnancy test in my hand that God wasn’t just blessing me with a baby, he was entrusting me to play an important role in another person’s life. I would have the joy and challenge of being a part of her whole life, not just her time as an infant.
And I hate saying it, but I have to acknowledge that the biggest parenting cliché out there is true. It goes so fast—at times too fast for my liking. But more and more I am excited about going through this all with my daughter at every stage of her life.
As my daughter grows and changes, I know each phase will bring with it different joys and challenges. What I am learning is that each phase is also an opportunity for me to grow and change as well.
Am I doing this right? I hope I’m always asking myself this question as a parent. Not with the anxiety that was always lurking in the back of my mind during that first year, but with the willingness to self-reflect, to make sure that I’m not running on autopilot and that I’m getting as much as I can out of this whole parenting thing. Rue is a first-time, stay-at-home mom. She is a relatively new blogger who writes about craft projects, natural parenting, and her life as an expat. Check out her blog at http://craftycrunchyspicy.blogspot.com/.
